The Witness Protection Program doesn’t always keep the bad guys away. In Open Road Films’ Hit and Run, bank robbery getaway driver Charlie gets found by his buddy that he helped get locked away (and apparently enabled his raping, as a running gag makes mention of). As the title implies, there is a lot of [...]

What to Expect When You’re Expecting. It’s “New Year’s Eve” in the neo-natal unit; “Valentine’s Day” with a uterus; “Knocked Up” times five. Unfortunately, that’s about the best I can about this film featuring the ups and downs of having a baby. In an attempt to jump on the multi-story, large cast bandwagon, director Kirk [...]

I tried to make a list of movies which I laughed at less than Universal’s newest release, The Five-Year Engagement, and could only think of two: “Observe and Report” and “The Passion of the Christ.” Films I found much funnier include: “The Love Guru,” “Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo,” “All About Steve” and “Platoon.” That does [...]

Based on the 1952 play by Terrence Rattigan, Terence Davies meshes personal pain with the struggles of the British people to overcome the effects of a devastating war in his latest film, The Deep Blue Sea. Known as the British Terence Malick, Davies has directed only seven films in the last 35 years including masterpieces [...]

Viewing The Lucky One was a very frustrating experience. On one hand, the story (by Will Fetters, based upon the novel by Nicholas “The Notebook” Sparks) is an often compelling tale of love, war and broken and healing hearts. On the other, however, there are so many instances where direction (by Scott Hicks, “Snow Falling [...]

With its budget said to have exceeded a whopping $200 million, James Cameron’s Titanic was the most expensive motion picture in history upon its 1997 release. During production, the cards were heavily stacked against the movie; it starred commercially unproven actors, the story was derided as a Romeo and Juliet rip-off, and the film ran [...]

All good things must come to an end. In the case of The Twilight Saga, even bad things end. It’s ending, for which the first, albeit short, theatrical trailer has been released by Summit Entertainment, comes in the form of The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2. I’m not a fan of the series, [...]

An Arab sheikh with more money than sense wants to import the sport and/or lifestyle of salmon fishing from cold and rainy Scotland to the barren desert of Yemen. In the meantime, the British government is floundering from scandal to scandal and greedily seizes upon the idea of a cultural rapprochement between the West and [...]

The poet Rilke said, “There is only one journey. Going inside yourself. Here something blooms; from out of a silent crevice an unknowing weed emerges singing into existence.” The unknowing weed takes its time to sing but sing it does in director Anh Dung Tran’s film Norwegian Wood, his first since “Vertical Ray of the [...]

Well it is mid-February and already my hope is that This Means War is the worst movie I will sit through all year. It’s a waste of talent and utterly senseless . . . which would be fine if it happened to be funny as advertised. Instead, the screenwriters — Timothy Dowling and Simon Kinberg [...]

Although I got a review out of it (making the experience a humanitarian effort), I take great pride in knowing I’m one of the few men comfortable enough with my masculinity to see a movie like The Vow. If its premise — the “true (at least by Hollywood’s standards) story” of love and the lengths [...]

Revisionist history being what it is, it’s still interesting to view a movie or documentary based on something one remembers. Such is the case with Universal’s newest offering, Big Miracle, starring John Krasinski and Drew Barrymore and directed by Ken Kwapis (“He’s Just Not That Into You,” “Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants“). Based on the [...]

Aside from scoring a big fish with nearly every take, I can’t imagine picking people’s pockets for a living to be very lucrative — the risk surely outweighs the benefits. But in Loosies, it’s precisely what Bobby (Peter Facinelli) does on a daily basis, although he tells his mother (with whom he still lives with) [...]

Most of us are extremely under-informed on the details of the Bosnian War thanks to the cursory western media coverage, and the mostly hands-off approach the United Nations took in responding to it. In the Land of Blood and Honey, Angelina Jolie’s writing/directorial debut, works to rectify that. And while it doesn’t shy away from [...]

Be careful if you prefer your movies wrapped up in a pleasant little bow with an obvious beginning, middle, end, and with all questions and conflicts answered and sorted out. Certified Copy raises hundreds of absorbing and metaphysical questions, none of which will be answered for you at the end. In fact, the audience is [...]

Like many movie snobs and deadbeat critics, I too studied film. As a consequence, I’ve met a number of hacks — among them was a young man who tried to emulate classic cinema. Everything from the scores he used, to his cinematography and narratives were brined in dust and had an air of pretentiousness. Usually, [...]

It’s quite disconcerting when people in the theater laugh at something they’re supposed to laugh at — even if it isn’t funny. That’s the way I felt during the entire two-hour running time of Garry Marshall’s New Year’s Eve, his “superior” sequel to 2010′s Valentine’s Day (though that isn’t saying very much). I don’t know, [...]

Nothing — and I mean nothing — can prepare you for children. So the advice you may receive from the five couples looking to conceive or adopt in Lionsgate’s What to Expect When You’re Expecting (or the best-selling books it is based off of) ain’t gonna help you one bit. What you will probably get, [...]

Loosely based on director Mike Mills’ own experience as the son of a gay father who came out in his seventies, Beginners is the story of sexual and emotional repression, thwarted relationships, and fresh starts. Hal (Christopher Plummer), at age 75, tells his 38-year-old son Oliver (Ewan McGregor), that he is gay and has been [...]

I never thought the life of a pickpocket was particularly endearing but after seeing the trailer for IFC Films’ Loosies, I’m not so sure. Master thief Bobby seems to be cruising along easy street — fine dining, buying to his hearts content and bedding pretty girls — that is until he finds out a one-night [...]

Fans of David Cronenberg may be at first put off by the pristine stuffiness that envelops A Dangerous Method. While the historical basis for the film is depicted in John Kerr’s “A Most Dangerous Method,” the screenplay has been adapted by Christopher Hampton from his 2002 stage play “The Talking Cure,” and it shows. This [...]

No theme in drama touches the heart more than the separation of lovers. In classic dramas from Romeo and Juliet to Wuthering Heights, we empathize with the feelings of sadness and loss that estrangement brings and can relate them to our own experience. Some stories of separation, however, lack deeply-drawn characters and do not have [...]

Um . . . hmm . . . wow. I’m stupefied at what a colossal mess The Three Musketeers has been made into. Three of the more prominent heroes in history have been watered down to pathetic caricatures and, in their own movie, given a back seat to a nausea inducing 3D experience and to [...]

Milk it for all it’s worth. And let’s be realistic, some of the actors in American Reunion, the fourth in the American Pie series (unless you’re counting the four straight to DVD titles) don’t have much going for them and probably jumped at the chance to reprise their roles. This time around, the crew reconvene [...]

Annabel (Mia Wasikowska) has cancer, but don’t worry, it’s just movie cancer. She has a brain tumor which has a precise ticking clock on how long it will allow her to live, so she can still run around, dance, skip, and eat cheeseburgers with milkshakes (to see what real movie cancer looks like, you’ll have [...]

If I didn’t know any better, I’d swear Garry Marshall was trying to break the unofficial record he set in Valentine’s Day by jamming even more A and B-list actors into his new romantic comedy New Year’s Eve. The ultimate result is they are all a part of your basic multi-threaded movie that intertwines the [...]

Mysteries of Lisbon is not so much comprised of mysteries, but instead a series of conversations which always lead to some sort of revelation. These revelations are melodramatic punch lines with interlocking characters continuously finding out who their parents are, where they came from, the results of lost loves, and everything in between. If the [...]

Bellflower is the result of some filthy filmmaking. I do not mean that as they did a poor job, far from it. I mean the shots are so real and intense you can almost smell sweat and whiskey infused body order while sitting in an air conditioned theater. There is a road trip scene where [...]

John Sayles’ newest film, Amigo, inspired in part by the director’s work on a novel, “A Moment in the Sun,” focuses on a vital American incursion overseas that has been all but paved over in our history books — the Philippine-American War, occurring at the cusp of a new century, barely fifty years after the [...]

Amidst the blood bath movies of Conan the Barbarian and Fright Night and the children’s film Spy Kids: All the Time in the World, One Day starring Anne Hathaway released this weekend. All summer I have seen trailers for this dramatic film and thought the premise was interesting, despite it looking like just another chick [...]

Julie and Julia is Nora Ephorn’s screenplay adaption of two books by two different ladies. In 2002, government employee Julie Powell came up with the idea to begin a food blog that chronicled her challenge of cooking her way through all 524 recipe’s in Julia Childs’ cookbook “Mastering the Art of French Cooking” in 365 [...]

At fortysomething, Cal Weaver (Steve Carell) is living the American Dream. He has a nice house, a decent job, two loveable kids, and unlike most people, he’s married to his high school sweetheart, Emily (Julianne Moore). But that white picket fence is only as strong as those who built it, and in Weaver’s case, this [...]

Last summer, Will Gluck’s Easy A was one of my biggest surprises of the year. When I saw the trailer, I didn’t realize that it would be a whip-smart satire of high school and high school films. Gluck’s newest film, Friends with Benefits, may not rise to the heights of his debut, but it shows [...]

Only in the movies. Only in the movies will an unemployed stammering fool be found dating a supermodel (Transformers: Dark of the Moon). Only in the movies will an underemployed fat guy be found dating a model and ultimately have two beautiful women fawning for him. This particular movie is Zookeeper. The fat guy is [...]

The umpteenth Adam Sandler comedy to be directed by Dennis Dugan, 2011′s Just Go with It is a semi-remake of the 1969 screwball comedy Cactus Flower, which was based on a 1965 Broadway production that itself was adapted from a French play. Now that’s a mouthful. Despite all this, Just Go with It more overtly [...]

Most scripts are divided into three acts: The setup, which introduces characters, plot-points, and locales; the confrontation, where both the antagonist and protagonist’s strengths and weaknesses are further examined — complicating the problem at hand — and finally; the resolution, which concludes the aforementioned conflicts. Larry Crowne, a love-story between an ex-Navy serviceman and his [...]

A new take on the legendary Musketeers is nearing. Announcing its pending arrival is another theatrical trailer for Paul W.S. Anderson’s The Three Musketeers. Shot entirely in 3D, the film boasts massively choreographed sword and gun fights as well as battles with bomb-laden blimps! All this in support of a story that has the three [...]

Topher Grace took time off from his role as Eric Forman in the hugely successful That ’70s Show back in 2004 (you know, that Dennis Quaid movie he totally phoned in on) and left the show in 2007 for a supporting role in Spider-Man 3. Following those two debacles was a role in a small-time, [...]

It is no secret that the last decade has not been kind to the great filmmaker, Woody Allen. Whether is it a loss of touch or focus, one could argue that Allen hasn’t made a particularly good film since 1989′s Crimes and Misdemeanors — while he has had minor successes in the past decade, there [...]

What good is Valentine’s Day without a nice big helping of sappy romance? Generally the answer is “none,” but today Screen Gems released the first trailer for The Vow, effectively telling the world that they’re doing their part to ensure there is tear-inducing romance ready for next year. Enlisting the aid of Hollywood’s favorite girl-next-door [...]

When you have lousy luck with the ladies, who do you seek advice from? A brother? A best friend? Griffin Keyes, the zookeeper at Franklin Park Zoo gets his tutelage from the animals he cares for. In the trailer for Zookeeper, he can be seen basking in those “making an ass of himself” moments which [...]

In 1953, Morris Engel made a film called Little Fugitive. It was about a boy who thought he had killed his older brother and ran off to Coney Island to live on his own. It’s a charming piece (even though Engel was more interested in capturing the realism of this little boy in this big [...]

Emily Giffin’s Something Borrowed is quintessential “chick lit,” a highly marketable genre of fiction that prides itself in depicting modern womanhood in a (mostly) humorous manner. And because it was an international bestseller with a built in demographic, a film adaptation was inevitable (although I thought it would have arrived sooner). Something Borrowed, director Luke [...]

Once a year, on the day of their university graduation, Emma and Dexter get together to celebrate the day they met. Based on the acclaimed novel by David Nicholls, One Day is a tale, spanning some 20 years, of enduring love and friendship through the best and worst of times for two people on separate [...]

An updated trailer for The Art of Getting By (formerly known as Homework) has been made available by Fox Searchlight Pictures. It stars Freddie Highmore as George, the misunderstood boy that has yet to be challenged, and Emma Roberts as Sally, the girl who can peel away George’s shell and force him from his apathetic [...]

Romance sells at the box office. Stephanie Meyer (the Twilight saga) knows this, Nicholas Sparks (The Notebook) knows it, and all of Hollywood knows it. 2010′s Dear John is exactly the type of romantic tearjerker to be expected from an adaptation of a Nicholas Sparks novel, and it’s awful. Look, I admit that this film [...]

The “big dreams, small town, no chance” premise is a recognizable refrain in literature and motion pictures. Directed by Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant, 2010′s Cemetery Junction is yet another feature to examine this particular quandary. If Gervais and Merchant sound familiar, it’s because they are the dynamic duo responsible for the original British version [...]

Temptation and fidelity: Two forces battling against each other continuously throughout the early years of a young couple’s marriage. For the first year or two, fidelity rules the roost but as the wedding anniversaries mount, temptation begins to chip away at this solid foundation. When opportunity is added to the equation, one’s character is tested [...]

Hitch meets The 40 Year Old Virgin with a mix of family values? Judging from the trailer of Crazy, Stupid, Love. that may be an apt description. In it, bland and fortyish Cal Weaver (Steve Carell) finds himself recently divorced from his wife Emily (Julianne Moore) (she cheated on him) and sticking out like a [...]

Most of those who came into contact with the 2008 Swedish masterpiece Let the Right One In were immediately captivated and hypnotized by its brilliance, especially in the wake of the insipid Twilight phenomenon. It committed an unforgivable sin, though: It was foreign and subtitle-laden, meaning the movie never existed in Hollywood’s eyes. Thus, now [...]

Much like Duncan Jones’ freshman endeavor, Moon, a film that was eclipsed (pun intended) at first, but which then skyrocketed to unprecedented levels of success during award season, Source Code is a cerebral thriller that takes an unorthodox approach to popcorn cinema. The similarities don’t end there, however; although both films were penned by different [...]

Every year Woody Allen writes and directs at least one movie (his films have a more of a foothold in European cinema nowadays). His first for 2011 is Midnight in Paris. Set in picturesque Paris, it examines the relationship dynamics of a soon-to-be married couple as they travel away from their comfort zone. Will Midnight [...]

The stereotypical Hollywood comedy formula receives a bad rap on a frequent basis, but this is only because the formula is too often implemented poorly. However, there are exceptions. If a film sticks to the status quo and does it right — hitting the expected story beats with wit and grace — the result can [...]

Over the past few years we’ve seen a lot of re-imaging of classic British novels looking to perk up the stodgy old genre with sex and gore. From the work of Seth Grahame-Smith and Ben H. Winters (Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters) to the upcoming Catherine Hardwicke Twilight-inspired Red [...]

We live in a society where there are laws that we must abide by; every citizen must live in accordance with the rights, privileges, and duties given. But there are times, I’m sure, when everyone wants to break the rules for their own good — one might have the need to perform a heist/extortion to [...]

Ivan Reitman’s royal fuck-up No Strings Attached may be the most perplexing film released thus far this year. The reason being not for subject matter or direction, instead it remains puzzling for its purpose — or lack thereof. Suitably released during the black-hole month of January, this misguided production offers nothing but a smack in [...]

I love everything about the female form. But if I had to rank my favorite parts, I’d confess to being an ass man. Coming in a close second are the breasts — I can’t get enough of them either. Anne Hathaway, has a great set of boobs. You may have seen them before with the [...]

Love is blind and fucking stupid. It can make a person do extreme things — endanger their well-being or make extraordinarily bad decisions — to find it and keep it. I Love You Phillip Morris, a film purported to be based on real life events, chronicles the adult life of Steven Russell, a con man [...]

Forever — the concept that something can last “without ever ending” seems implausible — nay — it is impossible. Yet at the same time, achieving something — especially love — that can last eternally and never wither or fail, is an insatiable lust that, unfortunately, no human being can ever conjure up. This makes Hollywood’s [...]

When I think of the word burlesque, the only thing that really comes to mind is a strip club. I imagine the term was coined so that married men could get away with seeing strippers, on account that the proper term in one of these clubs would be burlesque dancers. See? It sounds so much [...]

Based on the obscure French film, Pour elle, of which I have never heard of, Paul Haggis’ The Next Three Days (which he both directed and wrote the screenplay for), stars the bankable Russell Crowe alongside the equally popular Elizabeth Banks as John and Lara Brennan, a married couple whose relationship takes a drastic turn [...]

I get the fact a will can specify the legal guardians of a child in the event of a catastrophic occurrence — after all that’s one of the main purposes of the legal document. Can it, however, specifically spell out that when the catastrophic event takes place, said guardian (or guardians) must move into the [...]

A teen comedy all about sex, without there actually being any sex, you say? Has John Hughes risen from the dead? Pretty damn close, as Will Gluck pays homage to the legendary director every chance he gets in Easy A — with better than expected results. The film works on several fronts, although the bulk [...]

I wouldn’t make a good father and I’m not afraid to admit it. I’m rude, have no respect for anyone, and I’m just a bad influence in general. But if I were to “spread my seed,” there would be a couple of positive impacts on the human race, namely my streaming blonde hair which just [...]

I don’t consider myself the conventional nerd. I’m not interested in technology; in fact I have trouble finding out how to change the screen resolution on my computer monitor. I don’t read comic books — except for those couple of times where I sat adjacent to the graphic novel section in Borders. To top of [...]

Burt and Verona are thirty-somethings, good friends as well as lovers, and will be parents for the first time three months hence. Verona’s parents are both dead, and Burt’s have announced that they’re leaving the country to live abroad for two years. With no real reason to stay near them in their cold house, Burt [...]

Youth in Revolt is a film I regrettably missed while it was in theaters, but for a film that I had some interest in, it came and went quickly. Despite this, I have heard many positive things from people who I trust, so I am definitely glad it has hit DVD and Blu-Ray. Overall, the [...]

The life of a musician, no matter how good it may seem in a music video (Lord knows how long and I hard I prayed to be a member of Mötley Crà¼e), it is no picnic — there is a shitload of behind the scenes work to do and more pitfalls than Pitfall Harry could [...]

When the 2009 Academy Awards happened, there were a lot of shockers. Hurt Locker beating out Avatar, Precious winning best adapted screenplay over Up in the Air. But the biggest shocker for me was the fact that The White Ribbon didn’t win Best Foreign Language Film. I thought the movie was flawless — a masterpiece. [...]

I’m a middle aged guy (balding, beer belly, etc.), so I’ll admit it: I don’t get this whole Twilight phenomenon. Sparkly vampires and bare-chested werewolves fawning over a human, high school girl who isn’t that hot just don’t mix well with my testosterone (I can’t figure out how it mixes well with estrogen either, but [...]

Woody Allen’s 2008 film Vicky Cristina Barcelona is a film with a moral: People do not change. No, let me rephrase that: People cannot change. Films of great depth have been made with premises as simple as that. Vicky Cristina Barcelona is not a film of great depth. Great style? Yes. But not depth. Not [...]

It is 1910, the last year of Count Lev Nikolayevitch (Leo) Tolstoy’s life. He is 82 years old and his writing days are behind him. His work was so popular that he gained followers — nowadays they’d be called fanboys — who were known as Tolstoyans. One of the main tenets of the Tolstoyans was [...]

One thing that a lot of people don’t know about me is that I enjoy the occasional “chick flick.” Yes, I said it (fully knowing the consequences that this may have on my manhood), at times I do like to indulge myself in one of the countless sugar-coated and seemingly implausible romantic-comedies that flood movie [...]

The road to box office success for movies based off of video games is potholed and strewn with broken down, bombed out carcasses (remember BloodRayne and In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale?).That doesn’t, however, stop the mostly concept-bankrupt power brokers of Hollywood from churning them, and films based off of comic [...]

How many years has it been since we, the movie going public, have been graced with the stylings of Jennifer Lopez on the big screen? Two years? Seven? The correct answer is four. The other correct answer is: “Not nearly long enough. Not by a long shot.” The Back-up Plan, the reason for her rousing [...]

His name is Rizwan Khan and he is not a terrorist. However, he’s a Muslim in a post 9/11 America, and not everyone believes him. He must tell the President in the hope that this simple message will filter down through society. The situation is not helped by the fact that Rizwan suffers from Asperger’s [...]

It’s an interesting concept: Soldiers returning home after the Iraqi war serving what’s left of their enlistment period as messengers for the Army, instructed to tell unsuspecting husbands, wives or other next of kin that their loved ones won’t be returning. I’m pretty sure it’s not official policy, but that’s what happens to Staff Sergeant [...]

Most published critics are idiots. Yet again this verity was reinforced to me whilst popping in and watching one of the latest films by Woody Allen to hit DVD. Cassandra’s Dream was almost wholly ignored in this country, lasting only a couple of weeks in the theaters. Yet, it is one of the two best [...]

Within the first ten minutes of my viewing of When in Rome, I knew the next 81 minutes of my life were going to be painful and feel like an eternity. Repeatedly, I had to remind myself that there had to be a comedic or romantic moment hidden away somewhere in the bowels of the [...]

Providing the text-book example for any agitated parent in need of an aid for their rehearsed “don’t talk to strangers” speech, the complex and life changing results for 16 year-old Jenny (acted by Carey Mulligan), after jumping into an older man’s car on her way home on a rainy day, will surely be of use. [...]

Herein the primary definition of tragedy: A dramatic composition, often in verse, dealing with a serious or somber theme, typically that of a great person destined through a flaw of character or conflict with some overpowering force, as fate or society, to downfall or destruction. In many colloquial settings, the word is overused to describe [...]

To think after the undeserved success of Alvin and the Chipmunks that a sequel wouldn’t be made, you would be considered a madman. The only surprise to be found is it took two years to concoct one. You’d think, however, with all that extra time, an interesting premise could have been formulated. Sadly, the extra [...]

Did You Hear About the Morgans?, the latest romantic comedy from director Marc Lawrence purports to be one of those cutesy, funny things happen when two people are put into foreign or uncomfortable positions kind of films. It succeeds in putting its stars Hugh Grant and Sarah Jessica Parker in stupid situations. It fails miserably, [...]

Don’t be fooled by the trailers for Up in the Air. It may seem like a formulaic romantic comedy. It’s not. Not by a long shot. Jason Reitman, following up his Juno breakthrough, has put together a finely developed and many times amusing story about choices — both personal and professional — and their consequences [...]

Catherine Zeta-Jones has undoubtedly crossed that threshold that separates the young from the old — no matter how many pilates classes she takes or face pulls she has performed. So it’s no wonder the spin on her latest romantic comedy The Rebound is that of an older woman hooking up with a much, much younger [...]

Thomas Alfredson’s 2008 vampire film Let the Right One In isn’t so much a horror film as it is a coming of age drama which happens to have a vampire as one of the two leads. Strikingly beautiful, nicely written and perfectly executed, it probably won’t be well received by all horror fans, but as [...]

Meeting your soul-mate and future husband at the age of six is an enough of an unusual scenario on its own. But to topple that — the guy in question is going on forty when you first see each other and wearing nothing but a blanket in a hedge. As an innocent member of the [...]

The already darkening skies encompassing the world of Harry Potter have darkened further in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, the sixth installment of the wildly popular movie franchise. Long gone is the baby-faced innocence our would-be wizards once had when they first entered Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. There is now deep-seeded resentment [...]

Oil meet water. Water, this is oil. The two of you don’t mix well, I know, but amazingly enough, you have more chemistry between the two of you than do the leads of The Proposal. Sure, the premise of the film is initially setup that way, but even after their heart felt metamorphoses they look [...]

Can the romantic comedy genre be out of steam? To me, it sure seems that way when: Matthew McConaughey is once again chalked up to be the leading man. The bottom of the barrel is scraped by stealing the plot devices of A Christmas Carol to tell the story. In a sentence, Ghosts of Girlfriends [...]

As much as I like to eat my Count Chocula cereal in the morning, I don’t want to eat it every morning — I need some variety. Same goes for my comedies. As much as I like Paul Rudd, I don’t want to see him in every joke-filled movie I see either. Especially when he [...]

With the rousing power Sex in the City is said to have brought to women (I wouldn’t know, I never saw the

Based on Bernhard Schlink’s 1995 Holocaust novel of the same name, The Reader balances brilliantly the dark, menacing undertones of war (and the ugly things one must do to survive) with the innocent purity of first love. This combination of opposites works incredibly well to produce a controversial film that challenges the very beliefs which [...]

I almost choked on my popcorn while watching Bride Wars. It wasn’t because every other minute I was laughing and kernels kept getting lodged in my throat. Nope, it was because I couldn’t believe I was witnessing Anne Hathaway follow up her acclaimed work in Rachel Getting Married with such a terrible performance in such [...]

To think a harrowing story about feral Indian brothers and their trials to reach manhood would be sneaking up to possibly steal a best picture Oscar. Such is the case with Slumdog Millionaire — a craftily told story (based on the novel Q & A by Vikas Swarup) that, through some major grit and grime, [...]

Writing a book or screenplay with vampires in it has got to be one of the easiest gigs around. These mysterious and charming undead basically lend themselves to just about any scenario possible — generally making said scenario that much more intriguing (its got a vampire in it, duh!). Proof in point: Twilight. Catherine Hardwicke’s [...]

Isn’t it great when you get a surprise? It gives you that warm happy feeling inside. Well, that’s exactly what happened to me when I watched Ghost Town. I saw it without expecting it to be hilarious and was thoroughly rewarded. The story follows Dr. Pincus (Ricky Gervais), a dentist who is totally disengaged from [...]

Kevin Smith and I are one and the same. Well, in reality he’s a tad fatter and shorter, and not nearly as handsome as I am, but we do share the same thought processes. Because of that, I’ve been a fan of his quick-witted, vulgar-laden writing for years so I couldn’t wait to see what [...]

A subtle, burning menace is hidden so beautifully in this new movie adaptation of Evelyn Waugh’s classic novel, Brideshead Revisited, that you almost don’t see it. Beneath the lavish chandeliers, the Oxford degrees and the vast amount of wine glasses, lies an inevitable disaster that surrounds the main character, Charles Ryder (Matthew Goode), as he [...]

What happens when the ego of a stuck-up little princess from Malibu gets a little too big for her Dolce & Gabbana tote? Why, her daddy sends her clear across the world to a British boarding school, of course! And that’s exactly what does happen to poor old Poppy when she finally pushes her dear [...]

Do you believe that every period drama is just another long and dull Jane Austen re-making with an updated cast as a twist? Most people do. You’d be a fool to think that way after watching Kiera Knightley’s new movie, The Duchess though. It captures beautifully the untold story of Britain’s most elegant and mistreated [...]

Miss Potter instantly came across to me as being a dull recollection of the life of just another dead author. But this movie is far from that. It turned out to be a moving and beautifully told story of the beloved children’s writer and illustrator, Beatrix Potter, a woman who created the timeless story of [...]

You’re among friends so I promise I won’t laugh at you. You know you’ve secretly wanted to see a musical set to the songs of Swedish super group ABBA. Okay maybe not, but at least admit you’ve always yearned to hear the singing voice of Pierce Brosnan and Meryl Streep. No to that too? If [...]

It’s been a while since a decent romantic comedy hit our screens since the likes of Richard Curtis’ Notting Hill in the late 1990′s. Recently though, I had the opportunity to see an engaging Christmas film, The Holiday. It stars Cameron Diaz and Kate Winslet in roles that us ‘non-celebrities’ can actually relate to. The [...]

WALL-E is the latest in the line of stellar features from the powerhouse Pixar. It is a romantic story of a small, lonely garbage cleaning robot that finds his purpose is greater than simply gathering trash into piles. Beautiful, charming and with an important message interwoven, WALL-E is flawless. When the people of earth cover [...]

Never heard of Miss Conception? No worries. I never heard of it either before today. It’s a little low-key romantic comedy – so quiet, in fact, it was filmed and released first in the U.K. before making a limited appearance here in the states. The only reason I found it was because it stars Heather [...]

James McAvoy has been a gardener, a heart-broken soldier, a doctor, a lawyer, a student and now in his latest movie Penelope, he’s become a gambling, conflicted boyfriend of a pig. Simply put, I know, but being a fan I feel this role of Max has to be one of McAvoy’s most understated and bravest [...]

This travesty of character and plot development obliterates any chance I would or could call Sex and the City a film instead of a TV movie with really good distribution. Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker) spends the entire TV movie trying to get married to Big (Chris Noth). Miranda (Cynthia Nixon) spends the entire TV movie [...]

We all know what goes in Las Vegas – it’s Sin City after all. You get drunk. You get laid. 80% of the time you gamble away a small fortune. And depending on how long you’re visiting, you do it all over again the following night. Why? Because what happens in Vegas is supposed to [...]

Holy shitwings Batman, a movie has been made specifically for Paris Hilton (bet you never thought you’d read a movie review start like that before). Somewhere a baby is dying because of this unforgivable offense to mankind. But then again, maybe not. Sure, The Hottie and the Nottie is an affront to all our basic [...]

Super smooth George Clooney has taken a break from playing his super smooth role in the successful Oceans series long enough to tackle (no pun intended) Leatherheads, a romantic comedy with a professional football backdrop set in the 1930′s. Aside from being an avid football fan (go Panthers), I was looking forward to seeing Clooney [...]

To quote the most famous line in the very well known movie Forrest Gump, “Momma says life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what your going to get”. From the beginning I expected Forgetting Sarah Marshall to be a hilarious, semi-sweet romantic comedy full of vulgarity and nudity. For the most part, [...]

Sometimes you just have to shake your head in disbelief because there isn’t much else you can do. While watching Uma Thurman and Colin Firth stumble their way through the ill-conceived The Accidental Husband, it was literally all I could do (spitting up my drink would have been too messy). This is definitely one of [...]

With a deep breath and high hopes I set out to watch the latest urban “find yourself” movie with a dance/rap backdrop — Step Up 2 the Streets. Why? I’m an optimist and a dreamer, and I firmly believe some day a movie like this will actually be worth the price of an admission ticket. [...]

I get the distinct feeling I’ve seen Fool’s Gold before. Tell me if this premise seems even remotely familiar to you: A reckless loser with a hot girlfriend, convinces her to join him on a perilous adventure searching for buried treasure on the ocean floor. Need some help jogging your memory banks? Try the 2005 [...]

Small screen starlet, Eva Longoria Parker has found herself in a starring role in Over Her Dead Body, the second major romantic-comedy release of the year (27 Dresses being the first). I can count two possible reasons why she’s in that position: 1.) The more accomplished romance leads were already tied up in other projects [...]

The staple of any good romantic comedy is the chemistry between the leading lady and leading man. This is highlighted by most movies starring Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan (Sleepless in Seattle and You’ve Got Mail) and 90% of the films starring Matthew McConaughey or Hugh Grant (mostly because these guys can have instant chemistry [...]

Someone, somewhere still thinks Jessica Simpson is a bankable product. But with declining music sales, a long forgotten reality television show and not ever actually having much in the way of a hit movie, I’m not so sure that individual still has a job. That’s because her latest feature, Blonde Ambition, has had perhaps the [...]

With time to spare and the need for something lighthearted and cutesy being introduced into my system (I had just reviewed Jack Ketchum’s The Girl Next Door), Enchanted seemed like the perfect choice. And let’s be realistic, has Disney ever led anyone astray when they needed this kind of infusion? The answer is yes, they [...]

I promised myself I would never watch another movie with Dane Cook in it again. I begged, pleaded and insisted that Hollywood not allow him to star in another movie after I reviewed his last monstrosity Good Luck Chuck. But just like my wife and kids, they don’t listen to me. He’s back in Dan [...]

The last good twisted movie (in my humble opinion) from the Farrelly brothers was seven years ago with their feature Me, Myself and Irene. True they had a few movies in between then and now, but they’ve been lackluster and relatively safe. Since then a new kid with an equally deranged mind and a desire [...]

Damn, my ass hurts. A lot. No it’s not from sitting in an uncomfortable seat at the theater for 96 minutes to watch Good Luck Chuck. It’s from being raped repeatedly by those who would release a hunk of shit movie like this and disguise it as an off-the-cuff romantic-comedy. That’s right, Good Luck Chuck [...]

Period pieces. These are the hardest movies to review. Depending on the time frame they’re portraying, they need to remain true to the past — there isn’t a lot of room for error or creative liberties. And depending on the type of movie (biography, historical event) they tend to get long winded and boring. Becoming [...]

Just a week or so ago, I reviewed the movie I Could Never be Your Woman. At the end of the review I mentioned I didn’t think any good romantic comedies were on the horizon. Well, guess what. I was wrong. One has indeed popped up and slapped me in the face. I’m not exactly [...]

Feeling old? Need a feel good about yourself, quirky kind of movie to raise your spirits? Never fear, Hollywood claims they have something for you (don’t they always?). It comes in the form of the upcoming film: I Could Never Be Your Woman. Will it help you to put the bottle of scotch and sleeping [...]

For all intents and purposes, License to Wed should have been just one of many romantic comedies released to little fanfare this summer. Nothing spectacular about it. But someone (the director, Ken Kwapis) got the bright idea to cast Robin Williams in a lead role. “Why?“, I plead, “What have I done to deserve this?” [...]

C’mon guys, you know it’s happened to you. You cried over the break-up with your first girlfriend. I’m guessing it happened to me as well, I just don’t remember it. My wife says I’m devoid of feelings — an emotional black hole, if you will — so there is a very good possibility that I [...]

Yeah, I know. I’m late to the game — everyone one calling themselves a critic has seen and reported on Knocked Up already. Each and everyone one of them has seemingly given it rave reviews too. They also all gave shiny, glowing reviews to Hostel: Part II and we all know how wrong they got [...]

Chris Rock — just what the doctor ordered. Great crossover appeal (I’m a white guy and he doesn’t appear threatening) and funny as fuck. This guy has to be one of the funniest guys in America and he seemly vanished into thin air. Until now that is. In his second directing gig, he drops I [...]

Oh boy. A black man holding a chain that is wrapped tightly around a petite, white girl. That’s all I knew about Black Snake Moan going into the theater. Nothing about a plot, nothing about content — just a picture of Samuel L. Jackson with an enslaved Christina Ricci. Exploitation at it’s finest! This has [...]

I’m a sissy, I’ll admit it. I have a girlie spot located in my abdomen somewhere for cheesy, lovey-dovey chick flicks. Especially the feel good ones starring Mr. Blowjob himself – Hugh Grant. It started with Four Weddings and a Funeral so many years ago and although it seems no one cares it’s been released, [...]

Well, I guess it’s time to see what the Hollywood hype machine has been pushing down my throat for months now. Norbit is a movie that lays out the life of a puny, pussy-whipped guy and his fat-as-fuck, overbearing wife. It is the latest Eddie Murphy comedy, in which, you guessed it – he plays [...]

It’s time for a feel-good, self-discovery movie. This time, however, our Hollywood friends have decided that the female lead usually given to Sandra Bullock, Renée Zellweger or Meg Ryan will go to Jennifer Garner. I guess they figured they needed a fresh face to attach to this comedy/romance; just like adding an air freshener to [...]

From the demented mind of Sacha Baron Cohen comes some remarkable characters like Ali G. (a wannabe gangsta), Brüno (a flamboyant faggot) and, of course Borat — a sexist, anti-Semite from Kazakhstan. The genius of these characters is the ability to allow Cohen to poke fun at, while “seriously” interviewing, people of all responsibilities (politicians, [...]

Let’s see – Sunday night, family is asleep and there isn’t anything on the boob tube worth my time. What to do? You guessed it; waste 95 minutes of my time on a spoofy, silly comedy. I figured after a dump truck load of shit has fallen on my head this past week, I could [...]

I want to know what these guys were smoking when they were writing the script for Superman Returns. So what was great about Superman Returns was the possibilities it could have taken with the script. After the beginning credits (which  were a great homage to the 70s/80s version of Superman), the whole film went downhill [...]

It’s been awhile since we’ve reviewed a movie starring Adam Sandler. Been even longer since we’ve actually looked forward to a movie starring Adam Sandler. But believe it or not, I was actually interested in watching Click. Perhaps I was hoping for comedy genius to strike again for him (see Waterboy or Happy Gilmore) – [...]

Again, I find myself drawn to one of those lovey-dovey movies that Hollywood simply adores. And more often then not, I find myself scratching my ass wondering what in the hell I was thinking. Guess what – this is another one of those times; but not for the reasons you might think. The Break-Up from [...]

Everyone, including myself, likes a good romantic comedy every now and then. After watching a few of the trailers for Failure To Launch, I figured it was that time. Failure To Launch is basically like all the romantic comedies before it. Good looking man (this time played by Matthew McConaughey) has a phobia or quirk [...]

Hmmm. . .Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt in the same movie. Arguably, the two best looking actors in the world. Initial thoughts? Mr. & Mrs. Smith has to suck. When the media focuses on the couple after filming the movie goes downhill. . .remember that shitfest Gigli? So needless to say, I didn’t go into [...]

Every once in a while a movie comes along starring Will Smith that has the look of being good. Every once in a while that movie will actually be good. I am pleased to say that Hitch falls into the latter category. As you can tell I’m not a big fan of Will Smith. He [...]