Articles by Dan Franzen

The Critical Movie Critics

For more reviews, visit Frothy Ruminations, the oldest review site you've never, ever heard of. Now in color! Remember - there's no need not to be critical. Kittens are critical of you; we should learn from them. And who doesn't love kittens? Ergo, cogit sum! QED! Whatever. I'm going to go have a kitten sandwich. Don't wait up.


Movie Review: Escape from Pretoria (2020)

Francis Annan’s Escape from Pretoria describes the real-life adventures of political captives Tim Jenkin and Steven Lee as they attempt to leave the titular prison before their sentences are up. Set in the apartheid era of South Africa, the film spends most of its run-time within the walls of the prison itself, leaning on a…

Movie Review: Trauma Center (2019)

Trauma Center, a brutally dull alleged action movie that nominally stars Bruce Willis (“Glass”) as a world-weary cop, is not the kind of movie that anyone will remember in ten years, or, for that matter, even later this year. Its premise is flimsy, its execution is disjointed, its acting is atrocious, and its conclusion is…

Movie Review: Inherit the Viper (2019)

Inherit the Viper is about two brothers and one sister who run an opioid ring in the Appalachias. It stars Josh Hartnett (“The Ottoman Lieutenant”) as Kip, the oldest brother; Margarita Levieva (“Sleeping With Other People”) as Josie, the sister, and Owen Teague (“Mary”) as Boots, the little brother. Kip and Josie are the local…

Movie Review: Grand Isle (2019)

Nicolas Cage (“211”) generally uses a couple of different gears of crazed for his movies nowadays, one a sort of wild-eyed screaming banshee and the other not so much. In Grand Isle, he dials it back ever so slightly to give us the kind of unhinged lunatic that most audiences (me included) find entertaining. To…

Movie Review: Badland (2019)

Although it supports a cast full of people you’ve probably heard of, Badland has the look and feel of a basic-cable Western. The acting is generally dispassionate, even dull, and the writing is third rate, to say the least. If you’re looking for an exciting action movie, you might be better off finding a test…

Movie Review: Auggie (2019)

A man, semi-forced into an early retirement, receives a gift from his former staff in the form of virtual reality glasses. Not just ordinary Oculus-type glasses but rather augmented-reality specs with a personal assistant named Auggie that only the wearer can see. The man comes to bond with his Auggie in ways that both enable…

Movie Review: Clara (2018)

An astronomer, obsessed with finding a planet capable of supporting life, hires a dreamy, itinerant artist with no background in science to be his research assistant in the majestic, gorgeous Clara. This is a movie that should appeal to romantics and science wonks alike, and it features strong performances by the two leads, who happen…

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