There’s an old saying in life that I believe was attributed to Confucius on his deathbed. It said, “Throwing a lot of spice at shit doesn’t make shit not shit.” Okay, maybe he didn’t actually say that, but he (or someone of equal magnitude) should have. Anyways, that quote is pertinent to Grown Ups because…
Tom Cruise used to be the personification of “badass.” He struggled to become the best pilot he could be in Top Gun, he overcame the impossible in Mission: Impossible and of course, he tackled a dystopian future in Minority Report. But it seems like the action-hero has aged quite poorly and these days he’s tackling…
Then: The A-Team, an 80s television show good for pathetically bad stories, overall bad acting, a shitload of random explosions, gun battles in which no one gets shot, and the rise of a mohawked bad-ass Mr. T (a man, by the way, that had no right to find himself in that situation). It did, however,…
1984, and Michael Jackson’s ‘Thriller’ is sweeping the world, including in a small ramshackle village in New Zealand. There, living with his grandmother, a younger brother and several cousins, we meet Boy. He’s about nine or ten years old, I’d guess. His younger brother, Rocky, is six and thinks he has super-powers. Boy has no…
I’m not entirely sure how I feel about Robin Hood the latest telling of the fabled defender of the poor. On one hand, it is a nice change of pace to see the legendary archer bloodied and dirtied — no finely penciled mustaches or tailored suits (ala Errol Flynn). On the other hand, is a…
The road to box office success for movies based off of video games is potholed and strewn with broken down, bombed out carcasses (remember BloodRayne and In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale?).That doesn’t, however, stop the mostly concept-bankrupt power brokers of Hollywood from churning them, and films based off of comic…
How many years has it been since we, the movie going public, have been graced with the stylings of Jennifer Lopez on the big screen? Two years? Seven? The correct answer is four. The other correct answer is: “Not nearly long enough. Not by a long shot.” The Back-up Plan, the reason for her rousing…
