General note to all before reading this movie review: if you can’t leave your reasoning and common sense behind, stop reading – Wanted is not for you. For everyone else, continue reading – an entertainment guarantee awaits.
Wanted is the story of a young account manager named Wesley Gibson (James McAvoy) who is suffering […]

WALL-E is the latest in the line of stellar features from the powerhouse Pixar. It is a romantic story of a small, lonely garbage cleaning robot that finds his purpose is greater than simply gathering trash into piles. Beautiful, charming and with an important message interwoven, WALL-E is flawless.
When the people of earth […]

Hancock is Los Angeles’ resident alcohol-fueled, low-flying sometimes hero. With all the exciting aspects of an action movie, sparkling comedy and a heartfelt plot, this is the most honest super hero movie I’ve ever seen.
When not drunk, John Hancock (Will Smith) flies around Los Angeles, protecting innocent people from criminals and disaster. The […]

Get Smart is a simplistic spy guy tale of good vs. evil and smart vs. dumb that tries to capture the allure of the 60’s television show Get Smart. Sadly, this cinematic upgrade should have followed its titular advice when it came to the writing, the acting and the action.
After overcoming personal obstacles, Maxwell […]

The Hulk has arrived and with him comes the first real action blockbuster of the summer. Yeah sure Iron Man made some big waves, but it was short on bone aching action and heavy on sleep inducing backstory. Director Louis Leterrier and screenwriter Zak Penn make the assumption you know who the Hulk is, […]

If you have ever wondered what it feels like to be punched in the face repeatedly by Mike Tyson in his prime, wonder no more. Adam Sandler, with the help of Robert Smigel and, gulp, Judd Apatow, have in all of their infinite wit and wisdom provided to you, for the measly cost of […]

Po (voiced by Jack Black), a clumsy panda and the son of a noodle vendor, dreams of becoming a great kung fu fighter and meeting “The Ferocious Furious Five”. This team of kung fu masters is comprised of Tigress (voiced by Angelina Jolie), Monkey (voiced by Jackie Chan), Mantis (voiced by Seth Rogen), […]

Can you believe its been 19 years since Indiana Jones graced (used loosely) the silver screen? In this latest installment of the storied franchise, which in my point of view is 18 year overdue, archeology professor and all around bad ass, Indiana Jones (Harrison Ford) is accused of treason when his friend Mac (Ray […]

Has 1300 years passed already? In the fictional land of Narnia it has and things haven’t been so good for the Narnians since Edmund (Skandar Keynes), Lucy (Georgie Henley), Susan (Anna Popplewell) and Peter (William Moseley) left to return to the real world. Actually, saying things haven’t been so good is a bit […]

Ingenuity is the mother of invention (or something like that). Since movies being harsh on the war in Iraq and on the current administration of the United States have been bombing (no pun intended) stupendously at the box office, writers Mark Leyner, Jeremy Pikser and John Cusack came up with a nifty idea – […]

Speed Racer is a fantastical, whirling, spinning, psychedelic abomination with almost no plot, horrific sets and one-liners that would be rejected by Laffy Taffy.

There is but one reason as to why this movie review is so late – I purposely looked to avoid watching Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay. Even though I consider myself an incestuous lover of sophomoric movies, I just couldn’t consummate the affair with the original Harold & Kumar Go to White […]

Like the wise one says, “Necessity is the mother of invention” and Tony Stark’s mother birthed the crude chrysalis of Iron Man in a cave in Afghanistan. While demonstrating the Jericho Missile, spoiled, womanizing, arrogant weapons manufacturer and brilliant engineer Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) is kidnapped by the Ten Rings terrorist group led […]

Set in ancient China, The Forbidden Kingdom is a mix of cinematic influences. It stops short of tiresome and of brilliance. It is quality cheese.
Nerdy Kung-Fu enthusiast Jason Tripitikas (Michael Angarano) spends enough time at the local video store to get chummy with the owner Old Hop (Jackie Chan). When Old Hop […]

Nim’s Island is the latest addition to the ever growing list of children books that have been adapted to the big screen. This time however, instead of taking place in part or in whole in some fantastical fantasy realm (Harry Potter series, The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe), this […]

Horton Hears a Who! is number three of Dr. Seuss books brought to the big screen by Hollywood looking for a new avenue to draw cash from. This movie is slightly different from The Cat in the Hat and How the Grinch Stole Christmas though. Whereas those two films were really just vehicles […]

Let me preface this by saying that Doomsday is, by no stretch of the imagination a good movie, but it is a shit load of fun and a hell of a ride. It’s messy, its inconsistent, and full of major plot holes but it does one thing many movies fail to do, and that is […]

No doubt writers Harald Kloser and Roland Emmerich (who also directed) had grand plans for 10,000 B.C.. Spectacular visuals supporting a tall tale set in the ancient world point to a movie with epic aspirations along the lines of Apocalypto and Gladiator. Unfortunately, they didn’t do their “homework”, as the movie is littered […]

On the surface Jumper looks like a movie I’ve been longing for – an action movie that has a character that actually embraces his or her extraordinary talent and uses it in a realistic manner (i.e., not like a superhero). Of course after seeing the movie, it doesn’t quite live up to my expectations.
The […]

I get the distinct feeling I’ve seen Fool’s Gold before. Tell me if this premise seems even remotely familiar to you: A reckless loser with a hot girlfriend, convinces her to join him on a perilous adventure searching for buried treasure on the ocean floor. Need some help jogging your memory banks? […]

Holy viral marketing campaign, Batman. Cloverfield, the latest production from J.J. Abrams (best known for Lost and Alias), may be the most hyped movie of the decade. It was pure genius – the whole country had vivid images of the Statue of Liberty’s head rolling down the Avenue of the Americas for weeks prior […]

Hey all, my name is Mike but my handle around these parts will be Phntmbanana. I got a chance to take a look at Rambo the new Stallone flick, and it was certainly a view to behold. It pushed the boundaries of violence in movies to a point I have never seen before, and I […]

With very little on the cinematic horizon for the young ones, I decided to take the boys to see the only game in town that met their demographic: The Pirates Who Don’t Do Anything: A VeggieTales Movie. I really had zero interest in this but that didn’t stop the kids from wanting to see […]

Rob Reiner has surfaced again, directing arguably two of the most accomplished actors of our time: Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman. The vehicle: The Bucket List, a comedy drama that tries to add a new twist to the Odd Couple scenario. Instead of just throwing together two incompatible people, as so many movies […]

I firmly believe there is a treasure hunter in all of us. The possibility of having your name attached to discovering a lost civilization or an artifact worth a fortune are all things we’ve dreamed about at one time or another. It’s the underlying reason that Indiana Jones was so popular (and still […]

The Hollywood remake. Love ‘em or hate ‘em, they’re a steady part of our cinema diet. I Am Legend proves once again that Hollywood believes the easiest path to success is to either: make a sequel or take a movie from years past and dress it up with an updated storyline and fresh graphics. […]

I’m not sure what all the hoopla was surrounding The Golden Compass. I believe it has something to do with the atheistic stance the author of the book from which the movie was adapted from had. Sure there are a few themes that indicate religion is a bad institution, but I don’t recall […]

Here we go again. Even though the old video game to movie adaption has played itself out some time ago, it has reared it’s ugly head above the surface once more to take a stab at our wallets and pocketbooks. No I’m not talking about a fourth Resident Evil (although I’m certain one […]

Let me start this particular movie review off by saying I’m a big fan of animated movies. I’m an even bigger fan of films starring real, flesh and blood actors and actresses. I am not however, a proponent of the stop-action animation that mixes these two forms of movies together. Apparently, Robert […]

I tend to get my guard up whenever I go into the theater to see a movie like The Kingdom. I always expect an overdose of political activism or some other jaded point of view that the writer and/or director wants to stuff down my throat. This, I believe, is the second such […]

I have to confess that until now, I’ve had the pleasure of avoiding this whole Resident Evil business; I haven’t seen either of the previous two films (Resident Evil and Resident Evil: Apocalypse) or played much of the Capcom games which, I gather, are only tangentially related to the premise at this point. So, […]

When it comes to Jodie Foster, I’m not one to run to catch the opening show, and Terrence Howard isn’t exactly a Will Smith, but The Brave One turned out just fine. This is an interesting spin on the old street vigilante concept. By the very nature of the material, this qualifies as pulp-fiction melodrama, […]

Sometimes movies look so much better on paper and storyboards rather than on an actual reel of film. Such is the case with Shoot ‘Em Up. It is every writer’s wet dream, a movie light on plot, dialogue and substance; heavy on nonstop action, including incredible gun and knife fights, car chases, aerial battles […]

Didn’t Jet Li retire last year? I guess the allure of making mostly grand action movies is just too strong – just like the smell of chocolate is irresistible to a fat person – because he is back and kicking ass in War.
This time, instead of being involved in some obscure Chinese tale (i.e., […]

A few weeks ago on another movie review blog (DC Girl @ The Movies to be exact), I guessed Stardust would be lucky to break into the top ten for weekend gross on it’s opening weekend. I came to that conclusion based on the fact the trailer seemed cheesy and childish — even if […]

This is definitely the year of trilogies. Spider-Man 3, Shrek the Third and Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End started the summer season off. Now Rush Hour 3 hits the silver screen and I must say, I’m a bit surprised by this release — after all it’s been six years since Rush […]

The Bourne Ultimatum is the third installment of the Bourne saga. This movie picks up right after Jason Bourne apologizes to the Neski daughter, without pause after the events of the second film, which may leave newcomers to the series a little perplexed. If you have seen the first two films, which I recommend before […]

Can you spell low budget? I can. It’s spelled D-I-A-M-O-N-D D-O-G-S. For those that are having a problem with that, I spelled: Diamond Dogs. As everyone knows between screening the monstrous blockbusters all the time, I’ve got to give back to the community now and again. I do that […]

Here comes Harry Potter for round number five. Will he come out of the corner with the heart of a champion or limp like a homo coming out of a bathhouse? That’s the question I asked as I finally found myself fighting the crowds and going to the cinema last night. It’s […]

Transformers the new movie by Michael Bay, is based not on a novel, play or screenwriter’s inspiration but on a line of Hasbro toys that have been hot tickets for young boys such as myself for more than 20 years. I could not think of a greater example of a text book summer blockbuster […]

Thank God for John McClane. That’s right I said it. Where would our great country be, if John McClane was not there to save it time and again? I’ll tell you where — right in the shitter. In Die Hard, he outwitted an international thief holding people in the Nakatomi Plaza […]

I have to start off by saying that I’m not a huge Fantastic Four fan and hence my review could be partially biased. Having said that, let’s get into the gory details of this movie . . .
Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer starts off with our heroes finally settled in with their powers […]

Chalk up number three of the summer. Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End has arrived in theaters and knocked out the oh-so endearing Shrek the Third from it’s elevated position as the weekend top grosser. But isn’t that what we expected to happen? After all, our lovable ogre lost a great […]

I hadn’t heard much about The Last Legion. But what I had heard was that it wasn’t particularly good — it doesn’t follow any true historical events and the action was rather inactive. Now, I certainly wouldn’t call myself a history major (I’ll leave that to my brother), so the possibility of that […]

Let me start of by saying that the most memorable part of Next is Nicholas Cage’s hair. I kept thinking of the Nick Nolte mug shot when he got caught for DUI. My main reason to go watch this movie was for Jessica Biel but I just ended up wasting some $10 on a ticket and […]

Here it is, Spider-Man 3, the most anticipated movie of the year. As a Spider-Man fan for most of my life, I can safely say I was counting down the days for this release. After Spider-Man 2, I found myself yearning for more. Could the third installment best the sequel which actually […]

Hot Fuzz is the highly anticipated movie from the team (Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg) that created Shaun of the Dead. Whereas Shaun twisted and made light of the zombie genre, Hot Fuzz pokes fun at the cop buddy movie made so famous by movies like Lethal Weapon and Rush Hour. All I […]

Where do I begin? I never quite know how I’m supposed to start a movie review, when I have already formed my opinion before seeing the film. Maybe I should begin by saying I’m an asshole for going to see a movie I know is going to suck terribly. Or perhaps I […]

After all the critical acclaim heaved upon Danny Boyle and Alex Garland for helping to redefine the zombie flick with 28 Days Later…, I was definitely excited to see if something similar could be done with science fiction genre. Granted, there are plenty of recent space movies but they’ve all focused on action and […]

Approximately ten times a year, to the theaters come those animated children movies we, as parents, cringe at. Our children want to go, no matter how bad the movie appears — so long as it has animated animals or dinosaurs or vehicles or rugs. Of those times only one or two of them […]

Time for a kick-ass action movie — the first of 2007. This time around we’ve got Jason Bourne, going after some bad-ass government officials who have wronged him . . . oops, I’m sorry I’ve got the movie confused. I’m supposed to be reviewing Shooter and I’ve started to review The Bourne Identity! […]

Has it really been 14 years since the freaky, full-sized, mutant turtles graced us with the presence on the silver screen? Yeppers, the last time I saw them it was in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (I’m not counting television cartoons or straight-to-DVD titles). I’m obviously out of the loop since a great […]

To be perfectly honest, there was no rhyme or reason as to why I decided to watch this movie. It has little to no fanfare, no actors I particularly like and it’s British. The last British movie I enjoyed was the classic from 2004, Shaun of the Dead. Before that, I can’t […]

Where do I begin? After all the initial movie reviews and hype surrounding the opening of 300 what else is there to say?
Let me begin, by saying the movie definitely lives up to the fervor surrounding it. You want action? You got it. You want crazy, vivid battle scenes? You […]

Flame On!
Nicholas Cage character Johnny, blazes the big sceen as the Ghost Rider with some intense visual effects and the fight for the balance of good and evil. Wife and I decided to spend the saturday evening at the movies and of all the choices we had, we decided to go for Ghost Rider as […]

We’ve all seen the trailers for Smokin’ Aces for the past week or so, depicted a wild movie in which the world’s best contract killers are all gunning for $1,000,000 for killing a mob informant Buddy ‘Aces’ Israel (Jeremy Piven). Who wouldn’t we intrigued by a movie that seems to promise a mile-a-minute rollercoaster […]

One of my favorite movie franchises has got to be James Bond. The man has it all - fine clothes, awesome gadgets, skills in every study known to man, kick-ass cars and of course, smoking hot chicks who line up to fuck him. Who wouldn’t want to emulate that? However, it is […]

Here we go again. Hollywood has once again decided to take a cheesy, campy 80’s TV show and upgrade it to the big screen. This time it isn’t The Dukes of Hazzard, The Beverly Hillbillies or Bewitched; it’s Miami Vice. And instead of Don Johnson and Philip Michael Thomas as Crockett and […]

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Johnny Depp is one of the best actors of this generation - even if I have to look past the fact he resides in that shit infested country France. I don’t think there has been a movie starring Mr. Depp that I haven’t found […]

I want to know what these guys were smoking when they were writing the script for Superman Returns. So what was great about Superman Returns was the possibilities it could have taken with the script. After the beginning credits (which  were a great homage to the 70s/80s version of Superman), the whole film went downhill […]

Another day goes by and I find I need to put some filler into it, as it isn’t filled with nearly enough activity. So as usual I fire up some popcorn get a cold beverage and watch a movie. This time The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift is the starring title. […]

After watching the first two X-Men films, I was positive this would be amazing, mind blowing visuals, and above and beyond any fan’s expectations. Instead you are left with an overopulated mutant community. The end result, much the same as elsewhere - resources stretched to the breaking point forcing everyone to settle for less.
The […]

Ah, summer blockbuster time. Sun is shing brightly, birds are chirping and Hollywood throws our way the movies that will make or break their year. The first movie of the season is Mission: Impossible III starring our favorite actor Tom Cruise as spy Ethan Hunt.
Now I’m the first guy to get in line […]

After a good long night of drinking, I finally sat down to watch what some are calling one of the best movies this year to come out of Hollywood.  I’m obviously talking about the latest offering by the Wachowski brothers - V for Vendetta.  The movie based off of a UK comic book of the same […]

Not sure about you, but I’ve always been a buff on the unknown, supernatural stuff. I’ve always been intrigued by vampire tales or ghost stories. The stranger and scarier the better. So without a doubt, I wanted to see the second installment of the Underworld series, Underworld: Evolution.
Underworld: Evolution has a simple […]

Although, I had never actually read the book - “The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe” (review title shortened, obvioulsy), I had heard a great many good things about it. So, I had high expectations going in to see this movie.
The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe […]

Some of you may or no may not remember, many moons ago MTV had a show called Liquid Television which was a show that gave air-time to independant animators. Aeon Flux was one of the more notable entries (as was Beavis and Butthead).
So I decided to give the big screen adaption a shot, as […]

I won’t call myself a devoted follower of the Harry Potter phenomenon dreamed up by J.K. Rowling, while she slept on the streets of Edinburgh. I would say, however, that I am a man who enjoyed the first three movies enough to look foward to seeing the latest incarnation: Harry Potter and the Goblet […]

There is a point where both video game fanatics and film buffs will want to see that neither the movie will try to be too much like the game nor the game too much like the movie… Or that the movie be too much like the others before it. But sadly, I walked away from […]

Let me start this review by saying that if my wife, whom I love dearly, didn’t want to watch this move, I wouldn’t have gone near it. I’ll be the first to admit Jodie Foster is a top-tier actress, but that fact didn’t outwiegh the notion that Flightplan is a hokey piece of shit.
First, […]

Quite honestly I can say, I had absolutely no interest in watching this movie. However, after hearing people fawn over Jessica Alba, I figured I’d give it a go. Luckily, I wasn’t dissapointed. . .
Yeah, I know suddenly you’re thinking ‘Mr. Peach must have enjoyed the movie’. Wrong. I expected […]

Just what the doctor ordered. A good ‘ole street-banging action flick by none other than John Singleton(whatever happened to him after Boyz n the Hood?). Four Brothers chronicles the actions of 4 adopted boys who seek to exact revenge on the people who killed their adoptive mother. . .a slight twist to the […]

With my folks in town and some time to kill, we decided to sit back and watch the latest Wes Craven psychological thriller Red Eye. Personally, I had absolutely no idea what this movie was about except for the fact it had some shit to do with a plane and crazy guy.
So, going into […]

Well, it was bound to happen again. No, I don’t mean that the sun will surely rise in the east, as it always does. I mean, another attempt has been made to bring a comic book to the silver screen.Fantastic Four is another attempt by the movie studios to cash in on the […]

Finally, a rendition of Batman that most fans of the comic book would be proud of. At least that was the hope I had when I finally sat down to watch Batman Begins.
Let’s start where the producer’s of Batman Begins got it right. Without a doubt, they nailed the persona of Batman. […]

Hmmm. . .Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt in the same movie. Arguably, the two best looking actors in the world. Initial thoughts? Mr. & Mrs. Smith has to suck. When the media focuses on the couple after filming the movie goes downhill. . .remember that shitfest Gigli? So needless to […]

I’ve finally given in. No, not to the dark side(unless of course you speak to my wife), rather I’ve finally given in and decided to watch Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith. After the first two debacles (episodes I and II), I was weary to say the least.
Let’s start by […]

DON’T PANIC. Every fan of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy trilogy (actually 5 books) were overheard repeating DON’T PANIC. Even I wondered aloud if the the big screen could even remotely capture the essence of the written material.
Let’s just say I was pleasantly surprised. This could have easily been a train […]

I went into this movie knowing full well D.E.B.S. was going to be a close second to that shitfest Elektra. But, I had to take a chance on chicks with short skirts, thigh highs, and the chance of lesbian make-out scenes. I’m a man, damnit!
However low my expectations were, I was still disappointed! […]

Wow. Another comic book…err, I mean graphic novel to movie adaptation. Which one am I talking about now? Sin City of course. An obscure graphic novel by the man who single-handedly made Batman cool again - Frank Miller. Although, most of the latest comics to movies have sucked ass (see Electra, […]

Let’s begin by saying I like Bruce Willis. Always have. Any man that bagged Demi Moore, is alright in my book. So I looked forward to checking out his latest movie Hostage. How can Hollywood screw up a movie that seems so similar to one of the greats: Die Hard?
Movie starts […]

How is it possible to create a worse movie than Alone in the Dark? Easy, dump out a piling heap of shit and title it Elektra. Now let’s be realistic. I knew the movie was going to be a waste of time and money. I watched this movie for two reasons. One, it was free. […]

Ok, I’ll admit it, I went into this movie thinking it was a pile of horseshit. Everyone I knew (and their mothers) claimed this movie sucked ass. “Shit movie” and “Keanu Reaves can’t act”, are a few of the remarks I’ve heard. Although I can’t argue the latter opinion, I make a case on the […]