Eventually I'll put something nifty here. Until then, know that I'm watching you. Closely.
When I’m not in the bathroom painting the porcelain canvas, I’m waging war with the Cyclops. But while Jackson’s adaptation of J.R.R. Tolkien’s famous novel lacks one-eyed beasts, it’s no doubt masturbatory. From a meandering script (conceived by Fran Walsh, Philippa Boyens, Jackson, and Guillermo del Toro) that doesn’t stick to a single body of…
The Expendables 2 is the Brazzers of explosion porn. The critical backlash surrounding its predecessor, “The Expendables” — an experiment in how many washed-up stars you can manage into a single film — didn’t detract it from becoming a success, and this sequel includes more of what every reviewer hated about the first—mindless gore and…
What is real? Some believe it’s everything we can obverse through our natural senses. Others think we’re living a computer simulation. All I know is that, whether real or not, Total Recall, Len Wiseman’s (who’s known for “Underworld” and “Live Free or Die Hard“) remake of director Paul Verhoeven’s 1990 adaptation of Philip K. Dick’s…
“You’ll hunt me. You’ll condemn me. Set the dogs on me. Because that’s what needs to happen. Because sometimes the truth isn’t good enough. Sometimes people deserve more. Sometimes people deserve to have their faith rewarded,” Batman proclaims ominously at the end of Christopher Nolan’s “The Dark Knight” — the critically-acclaimed second installment in the…
It’s hard to imagine a movie called Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter being highbrow cinema, but that’s exactly what director Timur Bekmambetov aspired of for his follow-up to 2008’s cult-hit “Wanted.” Unfortunately, in spite of its silly title (which hearkens back to grindhouse-era exploitation cinema), the film rarely cracks a joke and its über serious tone…
What I loved about 1997’s “Men in Black” was it embraced its own corniness. The aliens were over-the-top and blew up like Jello molds; the sets had a distinct comic book feel to them; and the story balanced workplace comedy with fantastical backdrops. The style worked, propelling the film to financial and critical greatness. But…
Anders (Anders Danielsen Lie) is a thirty-four-year-old recovering drug addict. Soon to complete his rehabilitation in the countryside, he’s allowed to go into the city for a job interview. Using the opportunity to explore Oslo, he’s confronted by the ghosts of his troubled past. Directed by Joachim Trier (whose 2006 debut, “Reprise,” made a splash…
