I'm an old, miserable fart set in his ways. Some of the things that bring a smile to my face are (in no particular order): Teenage back acne, the rain on my face, long walks on the beach and redneck women named Francis. Oh yeah, I like to watch and criticize movies.
Ron Burgundy is an idiot. You would know that even if you didn’t see 2004’s “Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy” because in the push to get people to watch the sequel, Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues, he demonstrated his idiocy in Durango commercials and every late night talk show that would have him. Reporter,…
And here I thought “A Haunted House” or what has become of the Scary Movie franchise (“Scary Movie 4,” “Scary Movie 5“) was as deep as the horror parody cesspool went. No, to my surprise it apparently goes much, much deeper. Ghost Team One, with its liberal use of profanity (most of which is painfully…
Irving Zisman is an 86-year-old horny, incompetent asshole and probably the last person on Earth you’d want to care for your child. So of course having him care for a kid is at the crux of Bad Grandpa, as the octogenarian has been charged to accompany his eight-year-old grandson across America to be with his…
Because no one knows Sissy Spacek. That’s the reason Carrie, the classic movie of what happens when bullying meets a hormonal telekinetic, was remade for audiences of 2013. Not because the 1970’s version by Brian De Palma had open, irritable flaws that diminished the Stephen King novel from which it was adapted that needed to…
If you are one to believe Sylvester Stallone (“Bullet to the Head”) can carry the role of a super-smart security expert then you are halfway to euphoria with his new film Escape Plan. If you’re not, surprisingly enough, the movie offers enough excitement for you to overlook that by continuing the recent trend of old…
At first I was going to start my review of All is Bright by remarking that Paul Rudd has the worst Canadian accent I’ve ever heard spoken by a Canadian. Then I realized he was born up the street from me in New Jersey, so that blew that observation out of the water. Now, I’ll…
Don’t look too deeply for an explanation to Plus One, Dennis Iliadis’ foray into the science-fictioney thriller realm. You’ll hurt your brain if you do even worse than the dull, damaged brains of everyone starring in the movie. When a meteorite hits the ground it couldn’t have come any sooner for David (Rhys Wakefield, “The…
