I'm an old, miserable fart set in his ways. Some of the things that bring a smile to my face are (in no particular order): Teenage back acne, the rain on my face, long walks on the beach and redneck women named Francis. Oh yeah, I like to watch and criticize movies.
I’ve been fired from a few jobs in my 36 years of life. There was this time I got canned from Tile City for ‘purposely’ breaking ceramic tiles. There was another time I was escorted off of a construction site for cursing off the foreman. It was so bad I was removed from the IBEW!…
Here it is. The second of the most anticipated movies of the summer is here. No, I’m not talking about “Gracie.” I’m talking about Shrek the Third. If the title didn’t give it away, it’s the third installment of the animated juggernaut — the first being aptly titled “Shrek” and the second even more aptly…
In 2002, we were introduced to the rage virus in “28 Days Later….” At the end of the movie we were made to assume that all will be well after mainland Britain was quarantined. But guess what? The rage is back in 28 Weeks Later and it’s badder than ever. 28 Weeks Later starts with…
Chick flicks. They’re not my strong point. The old coming of age, sappy shit never played well with me. My therapist tells me it’s because I’m just not in touch with my feminine side. I tell him it’s because I’m a red-blooded American male and that he can go fuck himself. But on a lark,…
I decided to take a chance. Rarely do I sit and watch movies or television shows about poker. The last time I did was in 1998 for the movie “Rounders” and that was only because I think Edward Norton is a great actor. I avoid movies about poker because they are boring. Unless you’re heavily…
I’ve finally gotten around to watching the Reno 911!: Miami screener that’s been sitting on a bookshelf for the past couple of months. I’d been meaning to watch it for the longest time, yet time after time that little thing called responsibility kept creeping in. Screw the lawn. To hell with the job. I can…
Jesus help me. I believe I may have just committed a cardinal sin — I watched another Jamie Kennedy movie. I would have thought I learned my lesson when I saw “Malibu’s Most Wanted,” Jamie Kennedy’s first foray into acting like a black guy (or a wigger to some). Shame on me though, because just…
